Say the Magic Words
by CUIntheair
Summary: A witch wants her writing to be more believable, and casts a spell to help. The problem? Now her stories are coming true. Bigger problem? Her stories happen to be devoted to a certain Carver Edlund book series. Crazy abounds. Plz Review!
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

**This idea is really just my way of showing the characters some of the more... imaginative Fanfic story lines. So, if there is a certain type of fan story you want to see, leave a review and I'll write a chapter. **

Chapter One- Once Upon a Fanfic Website

_Isabella's finger's flew over the keys. There was a rather maniacal smile on her face. She almost laughed, she never felt this inspired, never felt the words coming so very easily. Suddenly she stopped. Frowning she looked at what she'd written with a more critical eye. Oh, Lord at the typo's! Her frown deepened when she realized that certain characters should just not use surfer lingo like, "Dude."_

_She hit her desk, knocking over her bag of gummies. Nothing she'd written sounded real. She had lost the essence of the characters, and that was not tolerable. Writing was her life, and by golly she was going to be better at it!_

_Suddenly she realized something, and went running to her closet. She pulled out a horrendously heavy book, and flipped rapidly through it_.

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><p>Dean was truly enjoying the day for once. Yea there was crazy crap going on, but hey, it could be worse. They seemed to have all agreed that a break was needed. Sam had his soul back, nothing was immediately gunning for their demise. Things were relatively sunny in their crap-filled lives. Yea, they still had plenty to take care of, but one day off wasn't too much to ask was it?<p>

Apparently it was. A flutter of wings alerted him that a trench-coated Angel of the Lord was standing behind him with bad freakin news. Dean turned around, but before he could open his mouth, he saw a very confused look on Castiel's face.

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><p><em>She internally repeated her mantra, "A good writer updates often."<em>

_Isabella breathed deeply as she uploaded her newest (and boldest) chapter in her favorite story. Oh was this one a shocker. She did strive for reality, but it was fiction after all, and there's always a way to talk around until a suitable explanation could be BSed. She couldn't wait for the reviews on this one._

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><p>Castiel opened his mouth, confusion beginning to be clouded by annoyance, "Dean, did you call for-" His words got lost. His gaze went past Dean, to an enormously confused Sam.<p>

"What in the name of God is going ON HERE." A surprisingly squeaky yell for such a large guy, but then Dean turned to look at his little brother.

He very well should have said sister at that moment.

"Dean, I'm a GIRL." He said it incredulously, almost matter-of-factly after his hysterical yell of a moment before. Sam's hair had grown past his (her?) shoulders, and the large muscles had shrunk into a surprisingly feminine shape. Though Sam was still very tall, she (he?) was slightly shorter. Most definitely a woman. A very pretty woman.

What the Crap. Dean didn't know how to process what he was seeing. Something about the inflection of her words and the look on her face made him sure it was Sam, the flannel shirt and worn jeans were now ludicrously too big for the petite she-Sam, and a horrified confused anger was plastered all over the younger Winchester's face.

Dean couldn't help it, after all that they had been dragged through in their lives, this was just not something he had ever expected. He believed in a lot of things, he had fought for a lot of things, and when his sanity had been pushed beyond all limits time and again he had held it together. Not this time. Dean broke down into the loudest laughing fit he'd ever had.

"Dude! You have boobies!" Dean barely got the words out. Sam was in a pickle, and he would help him figure it out, but in this temporary breakdown, that was all that Dean could say. Repeatedly. With an ever angrier Sam about to throw a legitimate tantrum right in front of him.

Castiel tilted his head in thought, "Sam, how did you change genders?"

"Cas, that is the ex_act_ thing I am wondering. I didn't exactly do it on purpose!"

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><p><em>Isabella allowed herself a few minutes of satisfied humming before sitting back down at the computer. Now to update her next story.<em>


	2. Chapter 2 Human Cas

Chapter Two- Human!Cas

Sam walked over to his duffel bag and started packing rapidly, "Well, screw you Dude, I'm going to Bobby's to figure this out."

Castiel closed his eyes in concentration. After a moment, he looked back to Sam in bewilderment, "Whatever caused this is not a witch or demon. There are no hex bags or cursed objects in this room, and demons cannot come near without my notice."

Dean had finally stopped laughing, and processed that whatever creepy-crawly had done this probably had larger plans, that in no way, shape or form could be good. He exchanged an, "oh, crap" look with she-Sam before turning to the angel, "Well what else would it be? Can a demon do that?" He took one more freaked out look at his new sister, "Why?"

Castiel sighed agitatedly, "Witches are damned. When they die, they become demons in Hell. They can still work magic. As to why... you two tend to be disliked." He turned to Sam, giving him a stare similar to how mathematicians look at complex equations.

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><p><em>Today Isabella was on a roll. Part of it was she never posted on tuesdays and thursdays, so Fridays tended to be "new chapter overload" as she put it. She had several stories to update, and seemed well on her way to getting through them all. She felt confident that she was finally improving. <em>

_She proofread her next page one last time and posted it to the site. She opened a new bag of gummies (they were her favorite addiction) and started perusing through her computer, looking for the next story to update._

* * *

><p>It happened quite suddenly. Sam disappeared from the motel room, and Castiel collapsed in a heap. Dean let loose a parade of expletives, grabbed his pistol from the bed, and ran over to his unconscious friend.<p>

Dean gently turned Cas over and the angel inhaled sharply. Castiel winced and then opened his eyes.

"This is becoming very confusing." his voice held gravel as he slowly sat up.

"What the hell?" Dean helped pull Cas up, "Are you alright? and what the friggin Hell?" He was angry, confused, and very ready to shoot something. He was also a little scared at this point that he was next. Between his brother and his friend, he didn't want to see how the day ended. He looked at Cas only to find the angel lost, staring frustratedly towards the floor, almost muttering to himself.

"Cas!" Dean shook his arm, rousing his attention. "You ok?"

"No." Cas held his hands palm upwards, staring at them. He bowed his head slightly and concentrated. Nothing. He looked up at Dean, fear on his face.

"Cas...?" Dean lost his question to the look in his friend's eyes.

"Dean," He faltered, "Something's wrong."

In an instant several cuts appeared across Castiel's forehead and a bruise under one eye. They were strangely familiar cuts. The same injuries Cas had received after a fall onto a fishing boat in Louisiana. His landing place after blowing himself to Kingdom Come in Van Nuys.

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><p><em>Isabella was just hopping onto Facebook when she looked at the clock. "Shit!" She leapt out of her chair and ran over to the little tank in the corner, on top of her dresser.<em>

"_I'm so sorry Donnie! O shit, you must be starving!" The goldfish slowly nibbled the flakes, and Isabella watched, fascinated. _

_When the fish was done, she noticed a grocery list sitting on the dresser next to the tank. She sighed and grabbed her car keys. Before leaving, she placed a sticky note on her computer, reminding her of the next story she would post._

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><p>Cas turned to Dean, the fear on his face increasing, as he glanced at his feet.<p>

"What?" the question was barely out of his mouth when his eyes shot up, looking directly at Dean. "I'm sorry, I know you won't admit it, but it's true." The words came out clear enough, but his inflection was wrong. His face distorted in confusion. He even put a hand over his mouth. It was almost funny, like he couldn't stop himself.

"What-" Dean began to ask, then his own face took on overt surprise and he spoke again, "No it's not, Cas. You aren't going anywhere. If you don't feel helpful, I'll teach you to shoot."

By this time, both of their body languages were speaking volumes. They had lost control of their words, and no amount of arm flailing and covering their mouths would make it stop.

Castiel stepped towards Dean, wide-eyed, "And what good would it be? It is the Apocalypse, time is limited. If you feel you need more help, call a hunter. I'm only a hindrance now."

Dean managed to slip through a swear word before he lost control of his voice again, "Dammit, Cas, no you're not! Whether you believe it or not, you've saved all of our asses so many times already that we can't give up on you! Not when we are so close! You're a part of this, and powers or no, we need you!"

Castiel closed his eyes and tried to turn the other way, but the force behind this dialogue was intent on him staying put. "For what? To die? Because that is about all I can do for you in this. And who has a soul left to sell for that? You? Bobby? Or is it Sam's turn now? All of you are so desperate to keep each other safe that you fling yourselves to Damnation without second thought! I have given everything I have to save you! To help you! I left everything for you, and now you three are the only family I have left and I will NOT let you destroy yourselves! If I stay, I will be the first one to die, and I know how you boys handle that. Not this time."

There was an agonized silence as both tried to move, to speak, anything against whatever was forcing this ridiculously outdated and most certainly fictional argument. Apocalypse? What the flying coconuts was going on? That was when Sam walked in, very male, holding a large bag of fast food. The look on his face was every bit as freaked out as the others.

"You guys ok?" The question seemed to make sense, but apparently Sam hadn't intended on saying it anyway. Dean spastically fought against it, but he walked over to the bed and sat down.

"Yea, Sammy, we're fine. Cas was just being an idiot." The veins in his neck jumped as he tried to stand, to scream, something.

"Dean-" Desperation colored the word, but Castiel was as stuck as the others.

"No, Cas, go ahead. Tell Sam what you told me! He'll say the same. If you run? We will drag your holy ass back to Bobby's panic room and lock you the fuck inside until you see sense! We owe you at least that! Don't you see?" He stood, though apparently not from his own willpower, "You saved us. All of us! Time and again. We can't give up on you. You're family, like it or not, you can't run."

Castiel turned, red-faced and shaking, to Sam who was quivering with the strain of trying to move. Instead he spoke, "He's right. How far do you really think you'd get? You're not running"

Cas stepped forward, "Watch me."

It was odd, like breaking the surface after swimming up from the bottom of the pool. Release came, and all three of them were left panting.

In unison came a loud, annoyed, "What the fuck?" A lovely trio of angry male voices.


	3. Chapter 3 Let's Take Five

Chapter Three- Let's Take Five

The three of them stood in place, breathing heavily. Sam threw down the fast food, Dean had his gun at the ready. Castiel, however, was looking at the floor, confusion still on his face, as he slowly raised a hand to his facial injuries.

Dean took a step forward, "Is everyone alright?" His voice gruff with anger, he looked back and forth between the other two.

Sam surreptitiously checked something in his lower regions, and sighed with relief, "Yep, I'm good."

Castiel let out a sigh as well, though it was very far from relieved. "Sam, at what point did you stop being a female?" His voice was heavy.

"Um, right when I got zapped into the impala, a few blocks away with food in the passenger seat. I came back as quick as I could." He picked up the slightly squashed bag and threw it away with a look of distrust.

"So you returned to normal, right as Dean and I became... affected?"

"I guess so. Why?"

Dean suddenly seemed to pick up on something, "What's wrong, Cas?"

Cas sighed, and his eyes shifted off to the side, "Dean, the dialogue forced upon us made one thing clear. The time frame of that argument was after we took the ring from Pestilence, but before we went to stop the fight between Michael and Lucifer."

Understanding flickered into Dean's green eyes, "When you were human."

"Precisely. I collapsed, and when I stood up, I was human. Once the... conversation was over, I'd assumed I'd be..." His voice trailed. His eyes searched along the back wall, avoiding the Winchesters.

"Cas, are you human?" Sam barely whispered through his amazement.

Dean picked up his bag, "Well damn. That's it, we are going to Bobby's. It's only about an hour away. Screw the haunting in Minnesota, their accents are annoying anyway, we are fixing this bag of batshit craziness."

The resolve in his voice went unquestioned by the others. They were packed and on the road in minutes.

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><p><em>Isabella strolled through the grocery aisles, humming the theme song to "Jaws" to herself. She was nearly done shopping.<em>

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><p><strong>Author's Note: Yes, no, maybe so? Opinions are always welcome! Also, any story ideas you want to see the Winchesters deal with? Leave a review or PM and I will make it a chapter!<strong>


	4. Chapter 4 Sis Fic

Chapter Four- Sis Fic

The impala pulled dramatically into Singer Salvage less than forty-five minutes later. Dean had always been a fast driver, but he'd been particularly reckless in fear of losing control again, because he refused to crash his Baby.

"I do believe I am beginning to understand motion sickness." Came a breathless but unmistakably snarky remark from the back seat.

"Shut up, Angel Face." Dean, couldn't retain his relief at not crashing. Castiel let it drop, and all three hurried in to Bobby's.

After a quick explanation, any calm they'd felt slipped away with Bobby's dire expression. He had been everything to them for years now, mentor, doctor, confidante, father. He had survived decades longer than most hunters, and with every interaction he had with the unluckiness of the Winchesters he just felt that they would be the death of him. Strangely, he didn't mind. What he did mind was what they'd do without him. Idjits.

* * *

><p><em>Isabella unpacked her groceries, turned the radio on, and made her way back to her computer. She smiled as she pulled the sticky note off of her monitor, very happy with herself for writing down the idea for this sweet-hearted one-shot. She normally didn't go for sis-fics, but she was sure this one was special.<em>

* * *

><p>Bobby adjusted his hat and gave each one of his boys an intense look, "Well, beats me. I'da put my money on a trickster or a witch. Best we can do is hit the books." He gave Cas an apologetic look, then went off to grab half a library worth of lore books. Sam followed helpfully.<p>

Dean turned to Cas, "So, uh, it's good you're here. I'm sure you can translate stuff even Bobby's shaky on." His voice was overly peppy.

Castiel gave him a mild "screw you." look. "Dean, you do not need to placate me."

Dean mumbled something unintelligible as Bobby and Sam walked back in, encumbered by dust-laden, semi-decayed books.

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><p><em>Isabella didn't believe in long chapters, she told herself that it was because the average person's attention span wasn't very big but truth be told, she was the one that was a bit attention deficit. She had trouble focusing on just one story at a time. She perfunctorily double checked her spelling, and posted. There was a very short moment where she wondered to herself whether or not she needed to get a life, but she shrugged it away.<em>

* * *

><p>Castiel, Sam and Dean disappeared. No warning, no flutter of wings, and certainly no calm reaction from Bobby. He didn't have long to cuss, because the front door burst open a moment later.<p>

"SHUT UP DEAN!" Absolute rage filled the voice.

Bobby's jaw nearly dropped when a young lady stormed in, followed by Sam and Dean. It was something out of a reject sci-fi movie. The brother's walked jerkily, faces red with the effort of trying to force their feet to cooperate. They were losing.

The girl, well, she looked like Mary. Bobby had only ever seen one photo of John's late wife, but this girl looked like her. She had Dean's green eyes, and was currently angry as all-get-out. She also happened to be translucent.

"Jerk-face! I am an adult, and will NOT be treated like a china-doll!" She turned around, casting a ghostly stare at Dean.

Dean tried biting his lips shut, but for the second time, he was riding the passenger seat in his own body, "Jesus, Jenna, I know how old you are! What I don't know is why you have suddenly become suicidal!"

Bobby stepped forward, his eyes bugging out as he experienced the Winchester's newest mystery first-hand. "Now calm down! What the Hell happened?" His eyes crossed as he attempted to glare at his betraying mouth.

Sam stepped forward, nearly losing balance as he struggled uselessly, "Bobby, she nearly got herself killed against a demon."

"I was trying to get information!" She crossed her spectral arms petulantly.

"And you were in such a hurry you screwed up the damn devil's trap! How basic is that! What were you thinking?" Dean spoke through clenched teeth. He seemed pleased with the progress. At least the words were getting garbled.

The hologram-esque young lady didn't seem to notice. "Dean, I was just... he was talking about-"

"It doesn't matter what it said, Jen. Demons lie! You shouldn't let it bother you!" Sam's voice cracked like an old man as he refused to give up struggling.

Her green eyes glittered like acid, "Take your own advice Sammy, before you start preaching it to me. How is Ruby doing by the way?"

A moment's dramatic pause, and she dissipated right as everyone else took a collective breath of release.

"Well... Hell." Bobby's reaction was much calmer than Sam and Dean's had been the first time around.

"So, what exactly do you think could cause something like that?" Dean was still trying to catch his breath.

A soft noise, and Castiel was standing in front of them, a look of concern on his face. "What happened?"

"Well I see you found your wings. Funny, I didn't hear any bells." Dean's smart-ass reflexes tended to go into overdrive when he was frustrated.

"Where the Hell were you?" Bobby frowned as he made his way to his books. He hated not knowing what was happening.

"Tanzania." This answer received nothing more than frowns, "Not by my choice, I assure you."

"Well, what took you so long?" Dean was calming down, but he wasn't quite ready to start researching like Sam and Bobby.

"I was... disoriented." Cas seemed to decide that that was all he would contribute to the subject and walked over to the stack of books, picking up the most decrepit specimen and diving into it.

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><p><em>Isabella yawned hugely, her ears popping in protest. She shut down the computer, called a cheery, "Goodnight!" down the hall to a roommate that didn't respond, and was asleep within ten minutes. Tomorrow was Saturday, no classes. She could conceivably spend the whole day writing. What a comforting thought.<em>

* * *

><p>The night proceeded like most nights at the musty Singer house. Cheep beer and old books. Whatever was going on, had completely stumped the Winchester brothers, and whenever Bobby attempted an answer, Castiel quickly and logically shut him down. Everyone's spirits started to sink. Well, everyone except Cas, who was clearly enjoying the return of his angelic abilities.<p>

By four thirty, when they decided to call it a night, they were no closer than when they had started.

**Authors Note: Is there a fic idea that you would like to force upon these unsuspecting souls? Leave a review or PM and I will do my best to make it happen!**


	5. Chapter 5 Destiel

**Author's Note:**

**This was really very mean to the poor characters, but if they were being put through fanfic, they would eventually run into some slashyness. Enjoy.**

Chapter Five- Destiel

Dean didn't sleep much, so it didn't surprise him when he drifted back to consciousness at nine in the morning. Nearly five hours seemed an astronomically high number. He yawned, stretched, and pulled on some clothing. He heard Sam doing the same from the other side of the wall. Dean smiled to himself, one of the perks about Bobby's house was separate bedrooms.

He was fully awake within minutes, and headed downstairs to get some coffee. Bobby was standing in the kitchen drinking a cup, already started on a second round of research. A certain socially awkward angel had spent the last several hours popping through old libraries and museums looking for helpful books that Bobby didn't have, and the old hunter was determined to read through all of them before Cas took them back. The silliness of putting a label like "theft" on it, when Bobby could put them to much better use than just collecting dust.

"Morning Sunshine" Dean called with only a little sarcasm. No one had turned into llamas in the night, no spectral fake sisters, no gender benders. The past few hours had gone rather well. He smiled sleepily.

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><p><em>Isabella liked to sleep late, but her roommate had staggered into the house drunk as anything at about five-thirty, and the noise of it had woken her up. A thousand curses against drunk, whore-y, stupid-face roommates! Since then she had been tossing, turning, and quoting her favorite Shakespearean insults. Finally she had given up. She sat, blinking blearily while she waited for her toaster waffle to be ready. <em>

_After breakfast she sat at her computer. She read through her recently posted stories, one had even gotten a comment. She smiled to herself as she pulled up a nearly forgotten, very unfinished story. She hadn't written any slash in awhile. Today was as good a time as any._

_Her smile turned wicked as she started the chapter._

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><p>Sam was the last one to walk in, his long hair still wet from the shower. He noticed Bobby's book and smiled, "Find anything?"<p>

"A big fat pile of headaches and no luck." Bobby replied without even looking up.

"Isn't that just great." Sam smiled wryly and shared a look with his brother before sitting down in one of the dilapidated chairs.

Suddenly Dean's phone went off. It was a wrong number, "Sorry, no Charlie here. Yeah, it's ok."

Castiel made a confused face, Bobby made a strange "harrumffing" type sound, and Sam stood up.

"Hey! What about Chuck?" He looked from Dean to Castiel excitedly.

"What about him?" Dean still harbored a small grudge against that particular prophet of God.

"Well, he sees what's going on with us, right? Maybe he knows what's causing this." Excitement lit up his words like Christmas. He did not want to suddenly find himself a woman again. Even Dean seemed to think this was a good idea.

"Not likely." Castiel just had to burst their bubble. "The prophet was sent the divine inspiration of the events precluding the Apocalypse. He was writing the story of the end of the world. Heaven no longer has plans, things have gotten off track from how they were meant. He will no longer be receiving prophecies. He can't help."

Dean was clearly not pleased with that news, "Great, well where does that leave us?"

Bobby called out from behind his lore, "Knee deep in shit to read. Now get to it."

"C'mon feathers, lets figure this out and kill something evil!" Dean jumped, and nearly skipped out of the room. He was definitely in a good mood this morning.

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><p><em>Isabella was having a surprisingly good morning, despite being woken up at an ungodly hour. She typed away. <em>

_ "Cas was human now, and with that came human feelings. These confused him, but he could never ask Dean for help. _

_ He couldn't look into those deep eyes and say it out loud."_

_She loved putting in as much angst as possible, drawing out the moment. Sometimes whole chapters would be introspection. Not this time though. Within fifteen minutes she had typed what she confidently thought of as a beautiful and dirty scene of fallen angel romance. She posted it and clapped her hands excitedly._

* * *

><p>Shit. Dean was in a musty motel room. Crap. He didn't have his gun. Fuck. How had he gotten there. He looked around and saw that at least he wasn't alone. Whether that was good news or not, he wasn't sure. Having his angel friend there couldn't hurt the situation, whatever it was.<p>

"Cas, you ok?" Dean noticed that Castiel looked pale. Not a good sign.

"Dean. I'm human." This was the second time in as many days, and Goddamn-it it was getting less horrifying and more annoying.

Well there went any hope of angel mojo help. Dean spun in a circle, trying to figure out where they were and what was going on. That was when he felt it. Right before it started, he felt the electricity fill the room around him, almost unnoticeable. Then his feet spun him around like a marionette. He saw Cas facing him in a similar way, head hanging as if in defeat. Well, almost defeat, the tendons in his neck were popping, showing how hard he was trying to slip out of the invisible grip.

"Cas, what is it?" These forced dialogues were getting old. They didn't seem to be doing any harm. Dean decided maybe he'd let it run it's course and save his energy for actually fighting the cause of all this.

"It's- It's nothing." Cas had apparently picked up on Dean's calm. Maybe he thought it was a new plan of attack. Lulling the puppet master into a false sense of security or something.

"It's alright, Dude. You can tell me." When Dean was relaxed the words came out more naturally, bringing their own inflections with them. It was weird, like watching a play from backstage.

"Dean. Really. I can't." The strangest expulsion of air was forced from Cas, it was almost a sigh, but not a natural one. "I can't tell you."

"Is it some kinda of human thing? Cause I can help. I know it's weird for you." Dean nearly stumbled as he was unexpectedly moved forward. Someone was very pushy, and it was pissing him off.

"Please, don't." Castiel's head jerked up like it was attached to a string. The strangest look came over his face. A combination of embarrassment, repulsion, and fear. Whatever he had picked up on, Dean was a little slower in the uptake.

"Cas, there is nothing you can't tell me. I'm here for you." Another robot-step forward. They were a foot apart. Dean would've rolled his eyes. He did not like touchy feeling crap, and his blood nearly boiled that someone was offending his masculinity in such an invasive manner. Invasive? Shit. He now understood the look plastered on Cas' face.

In that moment they both decided, screw false sense of security, screw saving energy, screw this crazy crap. They fought against what what happening with every ounce of panicked strength they could muster.

Dean's traitorous hand reached out, he couldn't stop it. It landed shakily on Castiel's shoulder. Cas' eyes nearly popped out of his head, while Dean gave him a "you better not" look.

Cas tried to stop it, but he took a step forward, closing the gap between them. This was worse than any horror movie. Worse than any monster hunt. They looked into each other's nauseated and scared eyes.

Dean took of that ridiculous trench coat, cursing to every creature, deity, demi-god and angel he had ever met. He threw God in for good measure. He had never felt such panic. His face had turned red, and then shifted into purple. Cas had turned white.

They both knew it was coming. Their bodies leaned in slowly, stiffly, they tried everything but couldn't stop. Torture was one thing, but what kind of sicko would force this on them?

It couldn't really be called a kiss. They both ground their teeth, tried to squash their lips shut, tried to stop it. Unfortunately, they couldn't. But that wasn't the worst part.

After the cringeworthy moment was over, they really lost control. They could barely register what was happening, much less do anything more than struggle lamely. Clothing went flying, hands went everywhere. There was more kissing.

A strangled whisper came through Castiel's clenched teeth, "Dean, I've never done this."

Dean was forced to reply by dropping to his knees. His hand (Oh if he could cut off his hand) started to reach...

There went that rushing release. They were saved from the very worst of what was surely to come. Dean wanted to cry with gratitude. He jumped back, and Cas did the same.

They couldn't look at each other. They gathered their clothing and got dressed. Dean had to fight off fits of gross-out shivers, and Cas was making a noise similar to a cat about to throw up. Dean noticed a small cardboard sign on the bedside table that read "Blue Moon Motel, Chicago"

After a few minutes of intense awkwardness, Dean cleared his throat. "So, uh. Do we need to steal a car to get back to Bobby's? Or are you an angel again?"

"Car." Cas still avoided looking at Dean.

Dean hot-wired a fifteen passenger van. Castiel caught on quickly, hopping in the very back row, as far from each other as possible. They would each need a rape shower when they got back to Bobby's.


	6. Chapter 6 The Call

Chapter Six- The Call

_Isabella wouldn't exactly call it a Mary Sue story. The character was strong and smart as well as beautiful. She had written what she thought of as a compelling backstory for this young hunter that would have a run-in with the Winchesters. _

_This story was taking longer than usual. She kept smacking the desk and deleting the entire thing. Every direction she found herself going, felt stale. She cursed the overuse of female characters in the books. Every different hunt, almost every day with those boys there was a different girl introduced. All of them were beautiful, strong, smart, funny, and gone before they got boring. To the point where any fan story with a girl just felt silly. _

_Isabella viewed it as a challenge. A challenge that happened to be whupping her butt. This would take awhile._

* * *

><p>"We will never, never, ever speak of this." Dean's voice held a menacing growl.<p>

"That will not be an issue." Castiel looked resolutely out the window.

It was a very quiet drive. A very awkward drive. When they got back to Bobby's they were met with worried looks.

"What happened?" Bobby's question was innocent enough. Dean answered a little too quickly.

"Nothing, why would you think something happened?" Dean went directly to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle.

Sam couldn't get any information out of them, and Bobby decided he didn't want to. Both Dean and Cas spent the next hour drinking whiskey and avoiding each other.

* * *

><p><em>Isabella was finally making headway. This wasn't going to be a horrendous Mary Sue after all. Suddenly her bedroom door burst open. Her roommate was nearly shaking with rage. <em>

"_What the fuck, bitch? What the flying fuck is your problem?" Her name was Mina, which made Isabella burn with jealousy. Apparently it was a family name, but she couldn't believe the luck of having a real classic horror movie name. Something had really pissed Mina off._

"_What are you talking about? Jesus, calm down!" _

"_Where did you put my phone? Why were you messing with my purse?" She stepped menacingly into the room. She smelled like stale cigarettes. College assigned roommates sucked so much._

_Isabella sighed, "What? I haven't even seen your purse."_

"_You are a fuckin' liar, Bella! Where is my phone?" _

"_Do NOT call me that! I refuse! I will NOT have anything in common with that sad excuse for a vampire movie!"_

_The two young ladies were rather riled up. The fight turned into a noise complaint, and a student housing representative showed up to ask questions. The whole process wasted most of the day. Eventually, Mina's phone rang from inside of her jacket. She found her purse by the front door and apologized to Isabella. It was all very stupid._

* * *

><p>After Dean had consumed the appropriate amount of alcohol for his level of mortification, he walked resolutely up to Sam.<p>

"Dude, we've still got nothing, right?" Sam nodded, and Dean continued, "I'm calling Chuck. Research isn't coming up with anything, and I'll be damned if we just sit here waiting for the next...whatever this is!"

No one argued with him. Cas had been killing time by allowing Bobby to show him the assembly and disassembly of a handgun. Sam had been enjoying the show. Cas could have been a good student, but he was quite tipsy.

Dean found Chuck's name in his phone and dialed. No answer. He swore loudly. He tried one last time, and it was picked up on the third ring. He was met by a very loud, very high pitch squeal.

Dean swore again. "Becky?"

"Oh My God!" The screech over the phone was audible by everyone in the room.


	7. Chapter 7 Fangirls

Chapter Seven- Fangirls

Becky spent at least a solid two minutes squealing in delight. Damn that girl had a crazy lung capacity. Dean had given up on calming her down and stood waiting out the storm. Finally she quieted enough to launch a barrage of questions.

"O.M.G." Yep, she spoke the letters aloud, "I can't believe this! I thought I'd never find this phone! I thought I'd never see you guys again! I was getting a little worried that maybe it had all been in my head, maybe I was a little cuckoo. But here it is! And there's your voice! Is Sam there? Omigod, is Cas there? Is he in a trench coat? Oh! Where are you? Are you killing things? Did you go to Lisa? Is Sam ALIVE? Ooh, tell me, tell me, tell me!" She spoke very fast, at near dog-whistle pitch in her excitement. Dean was honestly blown away.

"Becky? Where's Chuck? Why do you have his phone?" He put a little too much growl in his voice for the situation, but something about this girl got under his skin. Maybe it was the crazy leaking out of her ears. Or her fascination with Sam and Dean's misery.

"Oh." Her excitement level dropped. "Well, Chuck is gone. He's been gone for a long time actually."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, we had kinda broken things off, but after a little while I asked myself 'how often does a girl get to date a prophet?" She took a dramatic pause, "So I called, and he didn't answer. Then I got worried, cause, you know, he drinks a lot. So I came over and he was _gone!_"

"How long ago was this?"

"A long time ago. It was... the middle of last May. We searched, but couldn't find anything."

"So that still doesn't explain how you got his phone."

"Well, I didn't have it! It's in his house!"

"Becky, if Chuck has been missing for this long, then why are you in his house?" He was starting to loose his cool. He was very ready to hang up, but Sam and Bobby were looking on with interest, and he felt some responsibility for Chuck.

"Dean, he disappeared! And that was _so _sad! But we couldn't find him! And then we found all of his manuscripts! Oh!" Her voice took on a reverent tone, "Two years worth of Supernatural books! All so beautiful! Well, me and his publisher were the ones leading the search party, but, nothing! It's so _poetic!_ He was so mysterious! So we printed his last books posthumously, like, in his memory. We knew that that's what he would have wanted."

"You PUBLISHED them?" Dean really wanted to smack her. And that was saying something because he didn't hit girls. Unless they were demons, or monsters, or... maybe he could make one more exception...

"Well, we're publishing them!" She didn't seem to realize how angry he was, "So that's why I'm here! I'm picking up the last two manuscripts. Then the series will be complete." She sounded wistful, as if those books ending was some wonderful tragedy. "So I was here, and then I heard the phone! I didn't have your numbers, and I thought this thing was lost! It was heartbreaking! But it was like, fate! That you called right when I was here!"

"Yea, fate. Listen, Becky, how did the last book end? How far had he seen before he disappeared?"

She made a squeaky sound again, "Oooh! It ended with Michael and Lucifer jumping into the cage! Together! And, Dean it was so beautiful! The closing paragraph, talking about the impala!" Her reverie seemed to implode, "Dean! Is Sam alive?"

Dean groaned, "Yea, we got him out of the pit. Now, we've got to go Becky."

"No! Don't go! Aren't you going to figure out where Chuck went? That is why you called, right? Or did you need help? Oh, let me help!" This girl was impossible.

"Becky, we are in the middle of something. I promise we will look for Chuck when we get things under control. But right now, this is definitely something that you can't help with." Dean spoke to her like he was explaining algebra to kindergartners, but she still didn't take the hint.

"Why not? I've read absolutely everything about you! And I helped you get the colt back that one time! Why can't I help? What is going on? Try me." She really did have an obsession and, surprisingly, a point.

Dean couldn't handle any more of this girl, "You know what, I'll let Bobby explain what's going on." Becky didn't seem to mind if her fangirl shriek was any indication.

Bobby gave Dean a dirty look, having to go through an entire explosion of questions himself. Yes, he says "Idjit". Yes, had been in a wheelchair. Yes, he always wore a hat. Finally the questions were through and he laid it out for her. No one really knew why they were even trying at this point, but whatever. It couldn't hurt.

It was good that it was Bobby on the phone with her, because neither of the Winchesters could have dealt with her reaction to the insanity that had been their life for the past few days. She always enjoyed their torture too much.

It took nearly an hour to get through her over-the-top reactions and finish the entire story. Cas and Dean had left out what their ordeal had been, but it was still most of the story. At the end of it all, Bobby asked

"Now, is there anything you know of that sounds anywhere near that pile of mess?"

She giggled, "Yep, there are entire terabytes I know of that sound just. like. that."

**Author's Note: The crazy that is Isabella will be back full force next chapter, I promise. Reviews are always welcome!**


	8. Chapter 8 Editing the Gospel

**Author's Note- Sorry for the extended absence. College gets out of hand very quickly, and it is difficult to find time to write.**

Chapter Eight- Editing the Gospel

Becky had fully annoyed everyone, but she had provided the first breakthrough. She tittered and squeaked and made little sense half the time, but this happened to be the one area that she could truly help in. She wanted to know the exact scenarios, the name of the false sister, everything. Bobby was still on the phone with her, passing on the information as she asked for it, listening to her furious typing.

The long and short of the forty-five minute discussion was that Becky, who knew the ins and outs of quite a few fan fiction sites, was searching for any user whose recent stories matched up. She figured that they were real stories that some monster was using against the Winchesters. Dean thought it was bullshit, Sam couldn't get past her retained creepiness and Cas was confused on the entire subject. To him, the Supernatural books were Gospels, and he didn't understand why anyone would alter, add, or otherwise edit the Inspired Word. They most likely would have hung up on her sooner, had Bobby not been such a sucker for her enthusiasm. The fact that they had absolutely no other leads was also a deciding factor.

It didn't take her long to find a user who fit the bill, Bobby put her on speaker phone and she read aloud a section of the most recent story, "_He couldn't look into those deep eyes and say it out loud" _She giggled nervously. Castiel coughed, and Dean interrupted.

"Becky! We don't know the narration. Why don't you find another story and tell us the dialogue." She started on dialogue, but not from another story. "So help me Becky, STOP!" She seemed to find it funny.

"Is this one of the stories you lived through? There was a _real_ Destiel scene?"

"A what scene?" Cas stepped towards the phone.

"Oh my God, Castiel is there too? Hi! Destiel is a slash pairing! A lot of people like making angels..." Her voice faded into obscurity. Castiel was not as dense as usual on the subject, because his eyes started shifting nervously and he stepped back.

"Becky, you really think some kid's writing this crap? And what, some trickster with a grudge and a bad sense of humor is magic-ing it to life?" Sam liked keeping conversations with Becky as short and on-track as possible.

"I don't know, but I know fan fiction when I hear it. Whatever is messing with you guys has something to do with this." She picked a different story by that author, and recited, word-for-word their encounter with "Jenna"

Suddenly letting Becky help didn't seem like such a bad idea. She checked the author's other stories, and they included all of the crazy impromptu skits that the boys had found themselves unwilling participants in. The author was ImNotBella426 and her profile said she was a lit major, even said her school. Jackpot.

After promising Becky that they would see her face-to-face to help find out what happened to Chuck, as well as assuring that it was only out of concern for her safety, they convinced her to stay put and let them continue the hunt from there. They were off to Colorado, and hoping that they could make it there without being zapped all over the map. It would really have helped if Cas could do some zapping of his own; an unspoken fact that the out-of-commission angel seemed very aware of.

The four of them packed up as many supplies as they could think of, they still didn't know for sure what they were facing. The only answer they could think of was the trickster, this sort of thing was definitely his style, but there was no trickster. That particular acquaintance had been a false identity for Gabriel, who was now dead. Things were not adding up. There were no hex bags, no signs of a witch working some spell on them, no demonic omens either. There were some things becoming clear though, each attack (as Dean and Cas were now referring to them) was exactly the same as the stories posted online. Also, the physical effects of the experience seemed to hang around until the start of the next scene, Sam had begun to glance around nervously every few minutes, as if doing a head count. Everyone was quiet, particularly Castiel. He had sobered up, but still refused eye contact of any sort. Dean wasn't much better, tapping impatiently against the barrel of his pistol. He had decided that he was remaining armed until the whole situation was over. He didn't know what he'd shoot, Hell he'd shoot himself if another one-on-one in Chicago happened.

* * *

><p><em>Isabella was furious. Why was her roommate so weird? Why was she always angry about nothing? Were all business majors that way? She threw her gummies against the wall. Half her day had been wasted, now it was nighttime and she was too flustered to sleep. She surfed the internet mindlessly, trying to calm down. She wound up on her favorite website, dedicated to Supernatural of course, and puttered around for awhile. Within the hour she was feeling slightly less bothered, and decided that writing would put her in a better mood. But what to write? She looked through her unfinished stories, trying to pick one to put a new chapter into. She hadn't really explored the she-Sam story, or the sis fic. She completely threw out the unfinished female hunter friend idea. Maybe something with Jo? Or to continue the Destiel story, picking up where she left off? Isabella blushed, naughty scenes always made her a bit giggly. To the point where she tended to leave them vague, or transition directly to the next day. It seemed classier not to get into all the sticky details. Maybe tonight she would take it as a personal challenge to write as graphically as possible...<em>

* * *

><p>Bobby walked to the library, grabbing a few final weapons. He called for Sam's help, leaving Cas and Dean alone by the door. They looked resolutely in opposite directions.<p>

"This is ridiculous." Dean broke the silence.

"Entirely." Cas' voice was particularly gruff.

"Alright then. We're good?" Dean's question was directed at the ground.

"Completely." Castiel answered, seeming to find the far wall much more interesting than usual.

Sam and Bobby came back, and the four of them loaded up in a large van. Dean was taking no chances on disappearing out of the Impala while driving. As Bobby drove, Sam, Dean and Cas continued reading, calling out suggestions as to what they were facing.

* * *

><p><em>Isabella blushed a deeper red, turning instead to the sister story. Much less awkward to write. She had a little trouble getting the wording quite right, brotherly moments were so perfect in the novels, and she wanted her characters to sound believable. It would be a short scene, but it was nice just to write.<em>

* * *

><p>Colorado was only two states over, but it would still be an eleven hour drive if speed limits were obeyed. With Bobby driving, it would take eight.<p> 


End file.
